Played
by OuroborosSnyder
Summary: My take on what happened immediately after the screen went black in "All In." BA. Warning: Ch. 3 rated T Plus and Ch. 4 rated M. Now COMPLETE! More info inside. "And their love for each other is something that is immeasurable...."
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Played**  
Show:** LOCI**  
Pairing:** Bobby and Alex. Seriously, is there anything else?  
**Disclaimer:** Sadly enough, I don't own anything. This is written for pure enjoyment only and no profit to be gained!  
**Rating:** Rated T for now. Watch the rating because it will definitely change!  
**Spoilers:** "Endgame," "Untethered," "Frame," and "All In."  
**Authors Note:** This came to me after watching "All In." The usual angst with some fighting, angst-sex, whatever you want to call it. And, of course, BA. Pretty much everything that is long overdue for them IMO. I would've posted it sooner but I've been out of town for two weeks (just got back). I worked on it all during vacation though…every night. =) I decided to try present tense for once. We shall see what happens. This shouldn't be too long. I have 3 chapters written right now. Hope you enjoy.  
**Summary:** This is immediately after "All in" ended. Just something that came to me after I saw it…

**CHAPTER: 1**

She waits until they're outside, heading towards the SUV when she calls to him.

"Goren!"

He turns around and tries his damnedest not to roll his eyes. He thinks he fails but he's not so sure; doesn't really care either. He just so fucking sick of _this_. He's sick of having to think twice about his actions. It's not right, he knows that much; it's not fucking _fair_.

_Since when did I care though? _He wonders and then can't help but ask, s_ince when did I __**stop**__ caring? _He figures it was somewhere between when his brother was killed and now. He knows that he still _cares; _it just doesn't show like it did before. Over the years he's lost a few things; his ability to care is one of those things high on the list.

"Was that fun for you?" She hisses.

"Eames—" He begins but she cuts him off. No surprise nowadays. He's not even sure why he tries.

"What the hell were you doing in there?" She prods. She looks like she's about to hit him. There's so much fucking anger in her eyes.

"Getting a confession." He says and then adds, "I thought by now you'd know exactly what that was." He says the last statement a little too calmly.

He feels like being a smartass. He's not sure why.

_Ass._

"Goddammit, Bobby. Do you _enjoy _putting your life on the line?"

He freezes, just for a split second.

_What life? _

And he almost snorts out loud but he catches himself before he does.

"My life…on the line?" He repeats her words slowly. There's amusement in his voice that he's unable to hide; they both pick up on it. "Eames, I didn't put my—"

"Do you have a death wish?" She asks, cutting him off before he can finish. She's a little more demanding this time.

_Death wish?_

"Eames, the gun wasn't even loaded!" He says. He's partially annoyed and partially in disbelief. He turns around, takes a few steps towards the SUV and wildly opens the door. He settles himself in the passenger seat and is engrossed in the notes in his binder before Alex can even process what was happening.

_One day you'll make a mistake, Bobby. One day you will and I can only pray to god that I won't be around to witness it. _

And with those thoughts, she can't help but shiver. Perhaps maybe that _day _has come. Or maybe it's time for a change before _that _day can happen. She walks around the black SUV and gets in. Before she starts the car she turns to him and barely whispers, "You're going to get yourself killed one day."

There's no anger present when she speaks to him. Bobby's surprised by it. He wants to respond to her, but there are still too many police officers present at the scene. Honestly, he's not really sure _how _to respond to her statement anyway. Now isn't the time so he reframes from responding to her and keeps looking over his notes. There isn't really any point to it but to keep his line of sight away from her.

The drive back to 1PP is quiet; you could cut the tension with a knife. Alex called in to report to Ross but other than that, besides the sounds of the city, it was deathly silent.

Alex couldn't help but replay _that _image in her head; the one of Bobby pulling the gun up to his head and pulling the trigger. She heard it click and she _knows _she flinched. She hates herself for even reacting to _that _but she wasn't prepared for it. Bobby had the confession he sought after; there was no point in doing that.

Sigh.

Bobby caught even her off guard. She knows it shouldn't have, but it did. She wouldn't admit it but she didn't see the bees wax on his left thumb. She didn't know the gun wasn't loaded. _He _played _her _and she's not sure if that's what's bothering her the most or not. Back in the day she would've known what he was up to but they're so off, so fucking off kilter that she can't figure out what his next move will be without a written out plan first. And she knows it wasn't loaded; she knows now anyway. Alex knows that he wouldn't do _that _in front of her, but she also has to admit that she fears he would; of course with no one around. She can't help but wonder if he's ever pulled out his Glock and aimed it at his head before. And if so, how many times and when?

_He did it so easily, so smoothly. Like he's done it before… He didn't even flinch when he pulled the trigger. Would he really kill himself? Would he take it that far…just to get some peace in his life? He looks better, seems to be doing better than before. I thought he was improving, I thought his stability was improving but now—_

Heavy sigh.

After the second sigh Bobby turns his head briefly to look at her. She ignores him this time and allows herself to go back to her thoughts.

_I'm playing you…_

She knows, of course, that he's almost always in control of every situation he gets himself, _both _of them into even when the odds are against him. Her rational side is telling her that he had complete control the entire time. But another side of her, however, fears it. She fears that one day that control is going to seep out of him so fast that he won't be able to regain it. One day his trickery won't work and it'll backfire on him. She doesn't want to be around when it spirals out of control.

Once she pulls back into the One Police Plaza parking garage is when all hell breaks lose.

Bobby gets out of the SUV rather quickly to Alex's surprise. He's out of her sight before she even has her seatbelt off. She groans in frustration as she hastily takes her seatbelt off and swings the door open. When she's just planting both feet firmly on the ground is when she see's Bobby storming around the back of the SUV and heading towards her.

"What the hell is _your _problem, Eames?" He asks and boy is he pissed. Alex hasn't seen him this angry since the time he was in Ross' office yelling at him about his paternity results.

_Brady._

Another thing she wants to sigh, question, get some fucking _answers_ about but once again there isn't time because she currently has a very pissed off Robert Goren to deal with.

"My problem?!" She's just as pissed. He can tell right away but he doesn't care.

He takes one giant step towards her and they're so close that it almost scares her. Almost. She can't remember him ever standing this close to her. He towers over her, she's well aware of the difference in height as well as body mass, but she also knows he won't hurt her. She just isn't used to seeing Bobby standing his full 6 foot 4 inches in front of her. He usually bends at the waist or tilts his body to one side to make himself smaller but not this time.

Alex thinks it first, but then the words are out of her mouth so quickly that she can't stop them; she doesn't want to stop them.

"Don't you dare use your size to intimidate me, Robert Goren! It won't work. I'm not one of your goddamn suspects." She roars.

He hears her loud and clear but chooses to ignore her of course. He doesn't back away from her either.

"You really think I'd put my life on the line like that? Do you really think I'd…I'd pull the trigger of a loaded gun poised and aimed at my head all for a…a _case_?" His eyes were dark and intense. The look in his eyes should've scared her, it would've scared any normal human being, but it didn't scare her. "In front of…in front of _you_ no less."

"Yes." She quickly responds without giving it a seconds thought.

Bobby was about to yell again, but the honestly in her answer halts him from doing so. She knows immediately that he's surprised by her answer. She can practically hear the gears turning in his brain; she can hear them _jamming._

_Yes?_

"Yes, Bobby, I do. I don't know where you'll draw the line for a fucking case anymore! I can't help but think that one day you'll be killed because of a goddamn case; because of one fucking suspect."

He squints his eyes at her and wastes no time in responding.

"And why the fuck do you care all of a sudden?" He asks. The shock in his features is replaced with vigor once again. He was changing his approach because he knows he's losing the former.

"Oh, don't you pull that shit on me, Goren. If you want to get yourself kill, or for that matter, if you want to _kill _yourself don't do it in front of me!" She bellows.

They never break eye contact with each other the entire time. He looks into her eyes, similar to the way he did when he told Ross, 'Yeah, my father was a killer. So I'm that too, is that it? Yeah, I'm a killer.' His eyes are just as consuming, just a fierce as _that_ fucking time and Alex isn't sure if he's about to bust apart at the seams or not when he finally replies to her.

"I'll remember that…" He whispers it so softly she thinks she imagines it at first.

It's nothing she expects during their little blow up. Bobby stares at her for a few more seconds, his eyes still powerful yet saddened deeply. He never blinks in this time period. He looks into her eyes a few more seconds; they seemed liked years and then turns and leaves. Alex watches him go of course and she swears she saw tears in his eyes. She too shocked, too stunned, too fucking _frightened _at the moment to move or call out his name. She can't help but drop her jaw slightly as she continues to watch him go. It wasn't the response she was waiting for. It was _nothing _she expected from him. All the fight in Bobby was sucked right out of him. And to her disbelief, he gave up without a fight.

_I'll remember that._

Those three words replay over and over in her head as she watches him walk around the corner and out of her line of sight. She shook all of a sudden, as if she had just stepped out of a warm, cozy house and into the arctic.

She felt cold. She felt like she had opened the door wide to something that was just starting to close.

* * *

**A/N: So, what do you guys think? Good idea or no? Obviously I couldn't stay away like I had planned. Maybe after _this _I'll take a break from writing. So, any thoughts? Opinions? Comments? Questions? And, of course, complaints? =) More to come!  
**

**-Snyder-**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Sadly enough, I don't own anything. This is written for pure enjoyment only and no profit to be gained!

**A/N: **I'd just like to make a quick note that this isn't a suicide fic. If I steer a story towards suicide, like I did in one of my other LOCI fics, I'd warn you first. I know that it's a touchy subject for some. Anyway, just thought I'd let you know. Enjoy! Oh, and this chapter is dedicated to Tigergorenrocks. She just had to have a new chapter sooner rather than later. =)

**CHAPTER: 2**

Bobby makes his way into One Police Plaza and quickly packs up what little items he needs. He ignores everyone, pretty much because they all ignore him, and goes about his business. He hopes Ross doesn't come barging out to bother him. After gathering what few items he needs, he turns and walks out of 1PP before he has to face _him _or _her_. He rounds the corner and decides to take the stairs if only to elude her just in case she's looking for him. Rationally he knows she won't come looking for him, but he can't take the chance. He's not ready to look her in the eyes; he's not ready to deal with her right now. He's not ready to face the fact that she's thought about him killing himself. It was evident and he's not sure if he should be happy she's thinking about him or not. It's just one more dilemma of his that'll be racing through his mind tonight when he tries to sleep.

And like everything else in the past few years, instead of trying to clear up the mess that would've been _okay _if she would've just minded her own fucking business, he quickly leaves and once again avoids clearing up the several problems Alex and him have in their partnership.

_Really, though, what's the point anymore?_

His eyes show defeat in them. He's ready to give up. He's _burned _out. He never thought he would be.

Bobby heads straight to his car, plops in, starts the engine and drives off. He makes it back to his apartment rather quickly. He opens his apartment door, slams it closed and then takes off his coat. After tossing his coat on the coat rack, he makes his way into his apartment and pauses. He looks down at his gun and pulls the holster off his belt with the gun still in it and tosses it on the table in disgust. He also tosses his cell phone, badge, and wallet onto the table next to his gun.

_Does she really think I'd kill myself? _He questions internally.

He wouldn't deny that he hadn't thought about it before, but he's never acted on those thoughts. He wouldn't deny picking up his gun after a few drinks. He'd even examined it once or twice and thought about it; about how easier it would be to just leave this world with one quick pull of the trigger, but he never turned it towards him. He's never aimed a loaded gun at himself before and figures he never will.

_There's really no point to it, _he concludes every time he fathoms the ludicrous idea. _And she thought…_

He knows people think he's crazy, but he thought Alex knew him better. He can't help but wonder how far gone she thinks he is. He was just trying to get inside Josh's head. He was trying to _play _him; just like he successfully did. He just wanted to mess with his head a little before he arrested him. He really didn't think Eames would freak out about it the way she did.

_But I should've known…_

Fuck.

He was happy it was Friday. He didn't have to go in until Monday morning unless he was called upon. He hopes Ross will call someone else in if a new case comes up. Bobby just wants the weekend to relax. He maneuvers his large frame through his kitchen and into his bedroom. He quietly kicks his shoes off and starts to change clothes, even undoing the first few buttons of his shirt so that his salt and pepper chest hair sticks out when he hears someone pounding on his door.

_What the hell is she doing here?_

He knows who it is. No one else in his _life_ would pound on his door with such force, such anger let alone come to his place.

He sighs while trying his best to ignore the pounding, but can't. He storms out of his bedroom and heads straight for the front door. He swings it open, rather roughly, and to her surprise he doesn't say a word. He just opens the door and turns around and walks away; he knows she'll follow him in.

Alex storms in after him and is about to speak but before she can say a thing, he speaks.

"What do you want, Eames?" He sounds so tired.

"What do I want? I want an explanation, Bobby." She uses his first name; that's the first thing he notices. The second thing is the tone of her voice. She sounds almost upset, on the edge, _worried; _not at all angry like before.

He turns back around when he hears the door close.

"An explanation…?" He sighs and heavily plops down onto one of the chairs in the kitchen. He rubs his eyes with the palms of his hands.

He's just so _tired._

"What are you doing?" She suddenly asks.

"I'm sitting here trying to figure out what _you're _doing here." He says exasperated. "I was trying to get out of my work clothes until you started pounding on my door." He adds with a tone of annoyance. He pulls his hands away from his eyes and looks at her just then. He immediately understands why she asked him the question she did. He sees her looking down at the table he's sitting at; his gun lying on top directly in front of him. "Eames—" He doesn't get any farther.

"Bobby, I need to know what you're intentions are." She says slowly and Bobby can't help but feel like he's back in college talking to one of his girlfriend's parents about his _intentions._

"Eames, I'm _not _suicidal if that's what you're thinking. I did nothing wrong and I'm sick of constantly feeling like I did. I was never in any danger. I got the confession we needed…" He says and chooses to stand up so he's right in front of her. "And _played _him at the same time. I think the only thing you're upset about is the fact that I played you, too." He snarks and grins in a way she's never seen before.

He gets it all of a sudden. He _did _play her; he played her for a fool and she fell for it and she can't stand it.

And he didn't even see it coming; he was too engrossed in his newfound knowledge to pay any attention until he feels it.

Alex slaps him, hard, on the left side of his face.

"Fuck you." She spits out.

She turns to leave just then but he reaches out and grabs her by one of her wrists.

"We're not done here." He says and she can see the intensity in his eyes. It's back, the profound, burning look he sometimes gets is full-on again and she can't help but wonder how he turns it on and off so quickly.

"Let go of me." She says sternly while mirroring the intensive look on his face.

And she's surprised when Bobby complies almost immediately. He pulls his hand away as if she's on fire; he pulls his hand away almost too quickly and Alex can't help but wonder if he's afraid she thinks he'll hurt her. Before she can even contemplate his actions further, movement catches her eye. He's walking away from her. That's when she grabs him by the forearm to halt him in his place. Her grip is so tight on his forearm that it feels like a vice grip has got a hold of him.

He turns his head and looks at the arm she has a hold of first and then he turns his body back around to face her. When he turns back around the look in his eyes is enough to send her reeling backwards. He has so much pain in his eyes all of a sudden. His eyes are so dull; they lack emotion, they lack _life_ again. They're not passionless but they're not lively either. She knows it's not just from the slap, it's from _everything. _And it scares her. She's not sure how one being can hold so much physical suffering and that's why she worries about him. She doesn't know how much more he can take.

"What do you want from me?" He whispers softly. She's taken aback by how much his voice has softened within a matter of a few seconds. That slap took the last of the fight out of him. She knows it. He looks deflated.

Every voice in her head was screaming 'no' but she ignores them all and does something she never allowed herself to do up until now. She acts on impulse, on instincts possibly and instead of answering him she reaches up to his face, yanks his head down and kisses him.

_You. Just you._

* * *

**A/N: Well, still liking and reading? Wow. I must say I'm very surprised by all the reviews I got. And even more so, a lot of the people that reviewed I didn't recognize. So nice to see new faces...er...names. =) Stay tuned for more. I haven't decided yet if the next chapter will be M. I think I'm going to break it up so there will be 4 chapters total (the 4th being Rated M). Thanks.**

**-Snyder-  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** Sadly enough, I don't own anything. This is written for pure enjoyment only and no profit to be gained!

**Rating: **This chapter is Rated like a T+. No sex, but not exactly child-proof either. Get it?

**CHAPTER: 3**

As she kisses him she thinks about his life. It's so fucked up, she knows it; everyone that takes the time to know him _knows_ it. She doesn't feel bad for him, though, she feels empathy for him. She's not kissing him because she hopes it'll help bring life back into him. She's not kissing him in the hope that it'll make him forget for just a few minutes, she's kissing him because she wants to; because she hopes _he _wants to.

Bobby breaks the kiss after a few seconds and pushes her away gently. He doesn't want to, but he _needs _to. He's unsure; she can tell that almost immediately even before he speaks.

"Eames…" He questions. His voice holds uncertainty in it. He blinks. He wants to lick his lips where she just kissed him moments ago but he reframes from doing so. He looks her directly in the eyes, blinks one more time and then roughly pulls her to him in a bruising kiss.

It's Bobby's resistance that ceases; he no longer has control over his actions. He pulls her so she's right up against him and kisses her so huskily, so callous-like and rough that he can't help but think that she'll be the one to pull away this time. She doesn't to his surprise, however. In fact his rigid forcefulness only fuels her desire for him. She finds herself very wet and knowing Bobby's the one to cause that only turns her on more. Right as he's about to plunge his tongue into her mouth to taste all that has been forbidden before now, she reaches in between them and hastily rips the few remaining buttons of his shirt apart. They both hear the buttons fly but they ignore them. Nothing else matters in this moment. Her hands quickly find his chest and they start to roam. She can't help but smile as her hands trail through his salt and pepper chest hair and over his muscular chest. She suppresses the desire to moan. Right as they break the kiss, her hands travel up to his shoulder blades and grab onto the collar of his shirt. He lets her as she almost painfully yanks the shirt off of him and slides it down his arms. It falls to the floor completely forgotten. He quickly assaults her neck as his large paws immediately go under the hem of her shirt. Before she knows what's happening, his lips are removed from the hollow of her throat and he pulls her shirt frantically, almost viciously over her head. His left hand quickly goes to her right breast; it easily covers it. He can't seem to control himself. He looks down at them and with just a quick swipe of his thumb over her nipple, it hardens; he can see it peak through her bra. He groans as both their breathing quickens.

"Alex…" He finally speaks. He can't stand it any longer. His hands stop moving; they stop feeling for a split second.

"Shh." She quickly says. He's not allowed to ruin it. He mustn't break the mood. He can't break their final connection to each other. She fears that all will be lost if he does.

So before he can utter another word, she captures his lips once more. This kiss is like the last; rough, tasting, _wanting _and it's during this kiss that he feels her tiny hands wrap around the belt of his pants above his dick. Her finger tips go beneath the waistband of his pants and she allows herself to yank him closer to her. He's hard as a rock already. He aches for her. His pants are so fucking tight it _hurts_ and he knows she knows this information. There's no hiding his erection. It's confirmed when she rubs her hand up and down his crotch; feeling him through his slacks.

"Fuck, Eames." He hisses.

She squeezes him through his pants and he sees her shaking her head. He can barely keep his eyes open during this time.

"It's, Alex." She tells him. She's in control.

She removes her hand and fiercely undoes his belt along with the button and zipper on his dress pants. He wants to stop her and make sure she wants this, but he can't. Not yet. Perhaps he's already lost control and is far past the ability to stop her but he wants to see how far she's going to take things, take _this._

_Oh, god, she can't want me, can she? We're so fucked up. I'm __so fucked up. __**This **__is so fucked up._

And right as his last thought crosses his mind, he sucks in his breath because the feeling of cool air hits him in places that it wasn't previously. He looks down to find his pants and boxers down to his knees and Alex tightly gripping his mammoth erection.

He groans. Loudly. It feels so wrong, yet so right and he knows that's one of the reasons _this _feels so good. Looking down to see Alex gripping and now slowly stroking his painfully hard cock is one of his fantasies. It takes his breath away and for a split second, he's unable to breath. He blinks a few times to make sure its real but he's no fool; no fantasy, no dream of his has felt this real, this good.

He feels _alive _again.

At first Alex is surprised by his size; she even makes a tiny 'o' with her mouth, but then not so much. She knew he'd be big, long, _thick, _and she can't help but lick her lips at the sight of him. The anticipation is killing her and she wonders if it's killing him, too.

_He's huge._

And she feels herself dripping wet with desire knowing he's standing erect because of her. It's a sight she'd envisioned a thousand times over but figured she'd never see.

"Bobby…" She says almost seductively. She's so fucking ready for him by this point that it hurts. The little self control she has left is currently allowing her the resistance from pouncing on him and taking him right here, right now on the floor.

Before she can say or think anymore, he pushes her hand away, pushes his pants and boxers down to his ankles, and steps forward and out of them. He steps back in towards her and is so close to her, he pulls her so fucking tight up against him that Alex can feel his dick twitch against her stomach when he goes in for another kiss. It's pressed into her stomach as they kiss and she can't help but wiggle to increase his pleasure. As she grounds into him she hears him groan. She can't help but smile against his lips.

_Jesus._

Bobby can't take it longer and dives his tongue into her mouth. Their tongues enter one another's mouth as such a bruising force that both of them groan. Bobby's tongue is so far down Alex's throat that she becomes instantly attached to him. He can't get enough of her. She wants more; she can't get enough of _him_ all of a sudden and she grabs his ass to pull him in even closer.

During their kiss Alex takes a chance to take him in. The way he kisses her, the way he moans when she touches him in certain places and shudders in others. The way his eyes become flames of passion; all which she has never experienced before. She's seen his eyes fire up before due to passion, but not this type of passion; not passion caused by love.

And she does love him. She knows it, but she's too afraid to say it. She assumes he doesn't want to hear it, figures he'll run away if she mentions it so she doesn't. It's unsaid; so much about their partnership is.

He pulls back to catch his breath and she immediately misses his tongue massaging, tasting, teasing, fucking _choking _her. She wants to feel that feeling again and she reaches towards him to get more of him but he grabs her two hands and halts her from doing so. Before he says anything he entwines his fingers with hers.

_Our hands fit so perfectly, _he thinks. _Her tiny hands in my large ones._

"Alex…" He hoarsely whispers.

And her head cocks slightly to the side. She's afraid of what he's going to say. They've been through too much shit to stop this, to turn back now. This is long overdue and Alex knows it was bound to happen eventually.

"Don't you fucking leave me, Robert Goren." She finally says. "Don't you_ ever_ fucking leave me!"

And Bobby is shocked by her wording; he sways back on to his heals. You could knock him over with a feather. He's perplexed because of the look on her face. He's really never thought of how _she _would take it if _he _left her; he figured she wouldn't really care. He always figured that she would just move on with her life as if nothing happened. He frowns slightly because he suddenly feels like a selfish bastard.

It's his turn to tilt his head to one side to look at her. Confusion is written all over his face; she can read this feature. He's unsure of what to say for a split second.

_Are you serious? Does she really think I'd leave?_

"Alex you know." He starts. He assumes she's talking about him committing suicide as well. "You have to know that I'd never put my life in danger unless absolutely necessary."

"Like…" She bites her lips and contemplates her next few words. "Like when you went into—" Her voice drifts off. She can't even say the place but her words allow him to finally realize that she understands his reasons behind what he did. Maybe not _agree _with them, but understand them nonetheless.

He nods and closes his eyes when he feels Alex rub her thumbs over the now healed marks on his wrists that occurred what seems to be long ago now. And he gets it. _He _doesn't even want to say the word.

"You have to trust me, Eames."

And with those words time is suddenly reversed. She remembers the time, the moment, the case, the exact fucking day he said those same words to her in front of the elevator at 1PP. She trusted him then. She _let_ him sidestep her and walk into the elevator without her. She _let _him go talk to Brady by himself. She _trusted _him.

_Do I trust him now? Should I trust him now?_

And she knows she should. She knows she _can_. Alex nods her head because she does trust him; she trusts him with her life even when there are signs telling her not to.

They look each other in the eyes a few more seconds; they feel like an eternity. There are so many questions between the two of them. Bobby finally asks the one question plaguing him the most.

"What are we doing, Alex?"

And she shakes her head. She wants to say, _we're doing what we should've done years ago, _but she reframes and settles for something short and sweet.

"No more talking." She declares and reaches up to stroke the side of her face with her right hand.

His eyes instantaneously clench shut. He leans into her touch, she notices that right away. He then reaches up with his left hand and grabs her right. He turns her hand in his and kisses the palm of it. She's amazed how gentle and soft this giant can be. It saddens her that he's starved for affection. She can see it in his eyes when he opens them back up to look into hers.

"Alex, are you sure about this?"

She sighs. It's such a natural reaction that she doesn't even notice it much anymore.

"Bobby…" She starts but is cut off.

"Alex, if you're only doing this to make me feel better then don't bother." He says.

Without delay she reaches up to slap him on the face again with her free hand but he's waiting for it this time. He grasps both of her hands tightly to keep them from moving, from hitting him.

"Let go of me!" She says again. This time he doesn't. The trust is back, he knows it, he can see it; so he allows himself to hold onto her wrists as he starts to pull her towards his couch. He knows she knows he won't hurt her.

Bobby backpedals and she follows him without putting up a fight. She has no choice with his large paws tugging at her small ones tightly. She's unsure, not nervous, just unsure of what he's planning to do.

He pauses right in front of the couch. He doesn't sit. He wants to stand for this. He swallows hard, closes his eyes for the briefest second and then opens his mouth to speak.

"Do you love me?" He asks. It's simply, soft and full of hope; she hears it in his voice. He almost sounds _scared._

Alex looks him in the eyes. She finally gets why he's asking her if she's sure. It's not because he's trying to belittle her. It's not because he wants to be an ass or be insincere to her and her feelings. It's because this means too much for him to ruin it. He's _being _sincere. He's _exposing _his feelings. And it's then that she looks past all the anger, all the hurt, all the _problems _in his life and all the complications in their _partnership_ and straight into his heart. She knows he's waiting for an answer but his question caught her off guard. Not in a million years would she have ever expected him to ask her such a question that would expose his feelings to her so much.

_This intimacy, this moment means so much to him. _She finally realized. _He's making sure…_

Alex recomposes, swallows and then nods. "Yes." She reveals and she see's him physically relax almost instantly. "I love you." And this is when he releases his grip on her wrists. He knows she won't run. With both of her hands she reaches up and cups his face. "I love you so much it fucking hurts, Bobby; especially when I see you do the stupid shit you do."

"But I…"

"I know…" She says as she rubs her thumbs over his full lips. She softly smiles. "But it still doesn't stop me from worrying, from wondering." She drifts off. He nods. He understands now. "You were talking about rage with Josh and I thought about yours and…" She pauses, unsure if she should even go _there _again.

_Your rage…it destroyed your ability to read things. _She recalls Bobby saying that line to Josh as he moved in on him for the kill.

"I may have rage, Alex, but it doesn't cloud my judgment like it did Josh's." He says softly.

"I…I know." She says as she lets her hands slip from his face.

And she finally gets it. Josh let his rage get the best of him wherein Bobby controls his. He focuses; he harnesses that energy and uses it to do good.

_You wanna bet that I don't have the rage to take a life like you did?_ Alex blinks as she thinks back to Bobby's words. They continue to repeat in her head. She remembers him saying those words and her whole body freezing for a split second as she sat and watched. And Alex knows he was playing Josh there was well. He's good at _playing _people. Bobby uses his words to trap people, to anger people into confessing. His words are a gift and she knows that those words were to scare Josh because no matter what, Robert Goren would never take a life. No amount of rage, or hate, or pain could ever make him do such an act. It just caught her off guard for a split second. It made her really _think._

"I'm sorry…" Bobby mumbles. He knows she's thinking of what he said to Josh. _I'm sorry for everything. _His eyes are closed when he apologizes and he looks almost ashamed.

"So am I." She whispers back and decides to save her thoughts, her questions for another time. "Bobby?" She asks. He opens his eyes and looks at her. "Do you love me?" She asks him. This is one question that can't wait. She has to know and he can't help but widen his eyes at her question.

_She doesn't know?_

And by the look on her face, he knows she doesn't. She looks apprehensive, desperate, on the edge as she waits for his response. She looks like she's expecting him to say _no _and only hoping that he doesn't_. _

He smiles just then.

"You don't know?" He repeats his thoughts softly. He's unable to hide the shock in his tone. "How can you not know." He says. Alex knows it's a statement rather than a question. She lets him continue as he reaches out and grabs both of hers in his large ones. "Alex, I've loved you for years. Even if it doesn't seem like it, I have. You're my everything. You're what gets me through the day. Thinking about you is what gets my through the long nights. You have to know that." He discloses and she thinks he's almost pleading with her now. "You have to believe me."

"I do." She says and slides her right hand out of his left to stroke his red check where she slapped him several minutes ago. He then pulls her up against him in a hug. They hold each other for a few minutes before Alex pulls back and says, "Bobby…" She whispers it so softly; he tilts his head down to hear her. "I need you."

He looks into her eyes and nods. He understands her need because he has that same need.

"You're sure?" He asks. He wants; no he needs to make sure.

This time Alex isn't angry about it. She knows it's just Bobby being, well, Bobby. Kind, a gentleman; he respects her too much to not make sure first. They're taking a big step and in such a small amount of time. And even though they've been partners for almost nine years now, he doesn't want to do anything to damage this; their friendship and partnership any further.

"Yes."

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**A/N: Well, see, it wasn't too Mish rating. =) The next chapter **_**should **_**be the last and is Rated M. And even though I hate ending with Rated M I'm going to this time.**

**Also, when I went back to watch the episode, I noticed Bobby had a black shirt under his button up shirt…well not in my fic! It's so much…hotter when he doesn't, don't you think? Easier access! Also, Alex had a button up shit, but who cares! He tore it off!**

**One more thing, I know there was a lot of problems with this site and people had a hard time reviewing. No worries. Thanks for letting me know you liked it…even if it was on other websites I'm addicted to. LOL I loved getting random messages on different sites about this fic. =) Stay tuned for the last chapter and thanks guys!  
**

**-Snyder-**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** Sadly enough, I don't own anything. This is written for pure enjoyment only and no profit to be gained!

**Special Thanks To: **ancim, annlynn1, chlark4, cifan, Fanmlz, gerfan, gorenrocks, Gypsy5, Humor In A Bittersweet Life, JamiW, jstapny, leorockqueen723, LOCISVU, luv2read2006, marie-scr, movieholic, mtm, PollyCrackers, rindy713, romiross, SexyScottishDoc, scarletbegonia74, Starlight63, and The Room Spins.

**Rating: **This chapter is Rated M for mature content and lots of adult fun!

**CHAPTER: 4**

_Yes._

After hearing Alex's one syllable answer, instead of leading her to the couch, Bobby leads her into his bedroom. He's surprised when he reaches the edge of the bed and turns at the foot of it just in time to feel Alex's hands come up to his chest. She pushes him, not too roughly, onto his own king size bed. He knows, of course, that he could've resisted; he's a much bigger person no doubt, but he doesn't. He looks at her questioningly, but doesn't say a word. For once in his life, Bobby sits still and watches her. He does as he's told because he remembers that she's in control. God knows he's not at the moment.

Alex is only wearing jeans and a bra, her shirt discarded long ago, so it takes little effort on her part to undress herself the rest of the way. When she unclasps her bra and lets it slide down her shoulders and onto the floor, Bobby's eyes widen and a small gasp is heard. When she slides her pants and underwear off at the same time, Bobby immediately reaches out for her. He starts to squirm with anticipation.

Most definitely not in control.

_She's so beautiful._

He needs to touch her.

_Now._

She walks right into his arms; she won't deny him this contact. Alex loves the feeling of his arms around her naked body. She loves how easily his muscular arms wrap around her waist. She gasps when he slides his hands her back until they reach her ass. He softly runs his large paws across her smooth ass; something he's wanted to do for a very long time. And Alex knows how he works; he has to touch, he has to feel _everything_.

She can't help but sigh in contentment.

_Why did we wait so long…__?_

"Oh, Alex." He softly says as he rests his forehead on her stomach. "You're so beautiful."

Alex gently pushes on his shoulders so that he's lying down with his feet draped over the end of the bed. She straddles his thighs easily and lays her head on his chest. She wishes she could stay like this forever. She feels his arms come up to wrap around her and she knows he's thinking the same thing. She can tell by the way he's holding her, cradling her. She surprised to feel his arms shaking and she can't help but wonder if she's shaking, too.

"Scoot up." She commands and gets on her knees so she's hovering over him. He does what he's told and slides up to the head of the bed so that his head rests on one of the pillows.

Once he gets comfortable, Alex straddles him once more; this time centering her wet core so that it touches his dick. He immediately moans because she teasing him. He can feel her wetness on his cock and it's almost enough to drive him over the edge. He wants to reach out to her, he even tries to but she pushes his arms back at his sides and on the bed to keep him from moving. She doesn't need to hold them down, she knows he'll listen. Bobby looks her in the eyes and see's her shaking her head at him so he holds still and allows her to remain in control. It kills him but he wants Alex to know that he trusts her, that he loves her; that she can take _control _of him anytime she feels he's getting _out_ of control.

He slowly closes his eyes wanting to revel in the moment of Alex straddling him naked when they shoot open. With her right hand Alex is gripping his cock firmly and stroking it agonizingly slow. With her left hand she slowly trails it up his inner thigh, admiring the muscles on his legs on the way up, until she reaches his balls. She massages them and loves the reaction she gets from him. She can't help but grin. For some men, massaging their balls is a turn off. She immediately knows this is untrue for Bobby.

"Oh, god, A-Alex." He moans and can't help but buck his hips a few times. "Feels s-so good." He incoherently mumbles.

It's been so fucking long since he had a woman in his bed. All but a couple of the women before were just quick fucks, but with Alex, he knows it's more than that. He actually loves her which is more than he can say about those other women. This is what he wanted all along. Her. _His _Alexandra Eames. He knows it, but would never allow himself to admit it. And with all the other women, it was always him in control. It was always just a quickie and then they'd fall asleep. There was hardly ever foreplay and he most definitely didn't see the love in the other women's eyes like he does in Alex's right now.

It's enough to take his breath away.

"Bobby…" She says softly.

Before he can say anything she leans down and kisses his chest. She places a few feather light kisses on it, one above his heart, before kissing him square on the lips. She removes her left hand from his balls and runs it through his hair as she continues to stroke him up and down with her right hand. She can tell he's deeply affected by her actions by the quickening of his breath. He closes his eyes as the kiss deepens.

And Alex loves the way he closes his eyes when they kiss. She always found herself keeping her eyes open when she kissed a man. Later on, as the years past she figured out that it all came down to a matter of trust. It takes a lot for Alex to feel comfortable enough to close her eyes while she kisses a man; with Bobby she feels right at home. It's not a challenge with him, it's easy to do; almost too easy. She closes them, mirroring the look on his face as he continues to kiss her passionately. Every now and then she can't help but open them just to watch him kiss her. He's so amorous, sensual, and so loving when he's kisses her that it makes her moan and close her eyes back up. He's _free_ when he's kissing her, at peace, and it makes Alex feel giddy because of this. And yet, it almost saddens her to know that she's never seen him look this _free _before in his life. All he ever needed was someone to love him and Alex feels somewhat guilty for not telling him sooner. But all her guilt, all her sadness is pushed aside for now because she knows now is not the time.

Alex focuses back on his lips. Their kiss continues, their tongues tasting their newfound territory when she stops stroking him. Her hand is still firmly gripping him, however, and he doesn't even feel her move, he's so engrossed in the kiss, so absorbed in _her_ until she lifts her hips up slightly and starts to lower herself down onto him.

Alex has always loved to catch Bobby off guard when she can. It happens so rarely and she knows she has when she hears a sharp intake of breath and feels him shudder. Alex's eyes roll back into her head almost immediately as she slides down the rest of the way and takes him in completely. He fills her to the hilt. It's pure heaven. Bobby immediately breaks the kiss and gasps for air. He wasn't prepared for it and moans at the feeling of his cock in Alex's pussy. She's so tight, so wet, so fucking small and petite that he's surprised he even fits.

"Christ, Alex."

Bobby's hands finally come off the bed and land on her waist; he's unable to keep them at his sides any longer. He's been a good boy for too long. He completely fills her and when she squeezes her inner walls she groans in both pleasure and pain because of how stretched she is. She knows right away that he's the biggest she's ever been with. She can _feel _it.

"Oh, god, Bobby. You're so big." She finally says as she gets use to his size.

She runs her hands through the hair on his chest as he slides his left hand behind her back and up her spine until he reaches the back of her neck. He pulls her head down and captures her lips. He's so turned on, so fucking horny that he almost feels young again. He nibbles at her lips, even biting it briefly before he plunges his tongue into her mouth once more. As their kiss deepens he can't help but buck his hips a few times yet again. He knows she's adjusting to his size still, but his pleasure senses were taking over. Alex gasps into his mouth each time he bucks his hips because with each thrust he gets deeper and deeper inside of her.

And the look she has on her face every time he bucks his hips is so sexy, so beautiful that it makes him harder, fucking hungrier for her.

Right as he breaks the kiss, he flips them so she's on her back. He hovers over her, still inside of her. Alex lets him finally take control. She can't help but smile at the sight of this Bobby. She too is so horny, so turned on that she feels young again. She reaches up to rub herself, massaging her breast with her right hand when Bobby bends down and takes her left nipple in his mouth. She bites her lip in pleasure and moans when he pulls his mouth away from her nipple and slowly starts to pull out of her. Just as the pressure in Alex is relieved, he slams back into her.

They find their rhythm almost instantly with Bobby setting the pace. Alex feels her orgasm building and is surprised how quickly she's going to come. She starts to moan, even begins to pant when Bobby grabs her by the waist and lifts her hips up. With the slight adjustment in the angle, her ass now completely off the bed, he buries himself deeper inside of her hitting all the right pleasure centers. Within a matter of a couple minutes Alex is screaming out Bobby's name as she rides out her powerful orgasm.

"Oh, fuck, B-Bobby." She screams and then moans, "Ah, god, y-yes."

He reaches in between them and feels for her wetness. He can't help but rub his long fingers over her a few times. This gets Alex's attention and she squirms at the feeling. Her removes his hand and looks at the glistening moisture now coating his long fingers. Just as he's about to bring his hand up to his mouth to suck her come off his finger, to finally taste her, Alex grabs his hand and does it for him.

_Jesus._

He groans and closes his eyes.

Bobby isn't ready to come just yet. He wants her to come again. He wants to give her the maximum amount of pleasure possible. When she releases his hand, he pulls himself completely out of her and hears her whimper. He shifts his weight slightly and repositions himself so he hits her G-spot every time. He knows, he's read that 'doggy style' is the best way to achieve maximum pleasure for a woman but he's had no complains thus far doing it _his_ way. He likes to look _his _woman in the eyes. And he knows he's good in bed, but he's not cocky about it either. He loves to pleasure women. He loves to see the look on their face when they're about to come. As he looks down and see's Alex, he groans because this is _her. _ Not just any women. It's Alexandra Eames. After bending down and kissing her briefly on the lips, he repositions himself at her entrance and slams back into her.

"Oh my god, B-Bobby. Please, don't stop." She moans and then murmurs, "Harder. Fuck me harder, Bobby."

And he willingly complies. Who is he to deny such a request?

His pace quickens. He's pounding into her so hard now that he's afraid she's going to break. He's fucking her; he's fucking all the anger, tension, problems and despair out of both of them. They both know it, they both feel it. All the problems they've gone through the past few years, all the problems in both their lives seem to slowly disappear with each painful thrust into her.

They're both loud, both panting and sweating profusely and that's all that can be heard besides the slapping of his balls against her body and the bed frame slamming up against the wall. The motion is bring her back up to a high again. She feels euphoria. She can't remember coming twice so close together. She tries to fight it; knowing that as soon as she comes, he'll come too. She can see it on his face. He's trying to hold off as long as he can. Just like her, he doesn't want this to ever end.

"Come for me, Alex." He says as he struggles to breath. His pace never slows the entire time.

"Bobby, I'm so close." She says as she closes her eyes. Her hands are out to her sides gripping the covers tightly.

"Open you're eyes, Alex. I want to look into your eyes as you come…and as I come inside you."

And as soon as she opens her eyes, she screams out his name again. It is one of the most powerful orgasms she's ever had and she can't help but shake in pleasure. She feels like she's about to explode from the inside out. It's so much and yet not enough at the same time. Bobby follows right behind her with his own orgasm; spilling his seed inside her as he moans her name. He pumps in and out a few more times until he has nothing more left in him. Their eyes never leave each other until Bobby shudders one last time and collapses on top of her. He's so exhausted he can't hold himself up any longer. Alex willingly takes him in, welcomes the weight of him and wraps her arms around his back.

She holds him and closes her eyes tight. She suddenly finds herself having to resist the urge to cry. It's so not like her to cry, especially after sex, but this means so much to her. She fights her tears because she knows; she just fucking _knows _that it'll concern Bobby and she doesn't want to worry him. She runs her hand across his lower back, feeling the sweat coated on his skin, and smiles. Instead of crying she smiles because she's finally at ease in life. She smiles because she can't remember the last time she was this happy, this comfortable. She feels ridiculously giddy having this big lug on top of her.

Once their breathing slows, Bobby is the first to speak.

"I take it we didn't need a condom." He mumbles into her hair.

Alex can't help but laugh. It's _so_ Bobby.

"No, I've got that covered." She says and he shudders when she runs her hands gently across his sides.

"I love you, Alex." He says and he's surprised at how natural it sounds.

"I love you, too, Bobby."

After a few minutes past he becomes more aware of his surroundings. He knows he's heavy; he doesn't want to squish her, so he gathers up with little energy he has left and rolls off of her. Her arms immediately tighten around him when she feels him start to roll off of him and he smiles because he doesn't plan on withdrawing from her. He takes her with him so that she's now lying on top of him. His arms immediately go around her petite form and he can't help but sigh in contentment at the feeling this is bring him.

He soothingly rubs her back with one hand and runs his other hand through her hair as her breathing evens out. Bobby thinks she's fallen asleep long ago when, out of the blue, she murmurs against his chest, "Do you know how long I've waited for this?"

He surprised by her words at first. Bobby squeezes her, not too hard, just to let he know he _knows _because he too has waited so long for this.

"I want you, Alex. I want you to be mine forever." He finally admits.

She lifts her head off his chest to look him in the eyes. She's surprised by his boldness, by his confession.

"I've been yours for years, Bobby."

And that's when his heart melts because he too has been her's for years. And the way her eyes are gazing into his, the softness of her voice, the way she's now stroking the side of his face; it's enough to make _him _cry. He knows right then and there that she's claimed his heart; completely, 100 percent. Bobby can't help but think back to what they just did; all the boundaries they just crossed. That goddamn _line _that's been blurred for so many years now. Their love making was something that he could only hope for in his dreams. Not in a million years would he have thought that Alex Eames would want to be with the departments whack job.

And then, a few seconds later he hears her mumble, "Besides, I'm ruined for anyone else."

And that's when he knows it's going to be okay. He's grinning from ear to ear because he too is ruined for anyone else; and in a good way. They still have things that need to be worked out, but they have each other and it took one bold move on Alex's part to get them to this point. It was long overdue; they both know it and both are happy it finally happened. They can start their life together because their love is so strong that nothing can break them apart.

And their love for each other is something that is immeasurable. It's not something that can be categorized, measured, calculated, gauged, evaluated, weighted, or even tested because it is what it is; two partners in love with one another.

And that's one thing that no one can take from them.

_The End._

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**A/N: Well, that's it. I hope you guys enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it. This was definitely fun to write while I was on vacation. =) The sex wasn't as angry as I had originally planned, but I guess I can save that for another fic, huh? Sorry it took me a bit to update. I have some things going on and just had finals. I got a 4.0, all A's again this quarter, so yay about that! =) Anyway, take care and thanks for all the reviews!  
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**Until next time,  
**

**-Snyder-**


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